Sunday, October 11, 2009

When we hear hearts break, we'll say they're playing our song

Props to anyone who tells me what song the lyrics in my blog titles are :]

I've decided to share a song with you (just lyrics... no way I'm putting up a video of me singing... you might as well just KILL me)

Here it goes...

Here's to You:

Content like a puzzle piece
that finally found its place
Snug in all directions
in the perfect embrace
You felt so right
you made my hear
t burst
But you can't judge a book 'till you've read it, first


Here's to you
for being sweetest at first sight
Here's to you
for being a little bit too nice
Here's to you
for keeping my thoughts awa
ke all night
Here's to you
for trapping me inside my own mind
Just look at what you've done
I hope you're happy now

My fear is bleeding through my palms
you can smell it
you can tell it's there
You make me so scare
You've got me shaking
Forehead's breaking out in sweat
One wrong move and you drown me in pure regret


So, I'm chatting with my pencil
and I'm speaking through my hands
I can't open just for anyone
it's just too much to comprehend
The taste of my tears
must give you satisfaction
'cause flinching in fear
is my only other react
Maybe someday I'll toughen up
and become just a little more brave
Either that or I swear to you
I'll take this to my grave


So some-mostly-imaginary-and-some-real-readers... do share with me what you think the song's about :]
I love whoever has read up to this point *<3*

Friday, October 9, 2009

Hide In Youe Eyes; Mirrors Tell the Worst Lies

Why am I such a hypocrite? I feel like I'm always trying to identify and correct my flaws, but I do nothing about them. But by "flaws" I don't mean flaws like the scar on my cheek or my unevenly tweezed eyebrows.
I always tell myself that I need to get up and run, otherwise I'll be totally out of shape for track come November. I always tell myself to eat something, because that's how I'll stay healthy and not become an anorexic. I always tell myself to not worry about my looks so much, and how my waist size is perfectly fine the way it is. I try to stop lying. I always promise myself to get home and study the second I walk through the door. I tell myself to get over him. I want to, but why can't I?
When I'm stressed I tell myself to get just lie down and really listen to music. To just close my eyes and let my heart keep in tempo with the beat; to let the layers of guitar and drums and voices and computer-generated sounds flow through my veins is to be in pure ecstasy. Listening to music is something I can do without a second thought. And writing. Practice. Author. Photography. Yeah...
On a more formal note, I just felt the need to share with you guys that I always feel sad when I find out that a guy likes me... Why is this? I dunno, I feel like I should be happier or a little more confident or something. Instead, I just feel I'm walking around with a heavy heart and some sort of burden on my shoulders. It's odd.
Another random thing; I bet you guys (I actually have followers now, so I have to stop calling all of the readers "imaginary" :D) didn't know that I write songs, now. It's true. I might post one of 'em one of these days. I really want to learn how to play guitar. That would be cool to have a guitar accompany my lyrics.
I just took a chem lest the last period of the day. It really drained me of all of my enthusiasm for today. It was easier than I expected, though. Meh.
I like blogging. Why did I stop? It's a nice way to practice my writing and organize my thoughts.

HEY YOU. I love you. Have a nice three-day weekend. :)

Saturday, October 3, 2009

Remember when we never had to remember when times were better?

I changed a lot within a short period of time.
No joke.
Or just developed my personality?
I don't know...
I haven't posted on here in, like, nine months.
I was such a loser nine months ago. Oh, poor, dumb, 'ol me.
Hmmmm... how did I change, exactly? Let's see, still-imaginary readers. First off, my musical taste has expanded quite a bit. That's right, instead of liking about four bands that happen to be well-known, I've started liking a lot of less-popular bands. I'm super glad they're that way, too. I feel special liking music that not many people know about. Another odd thing is that I've developed a taste for... dundundun... screamo music. Oh my, nine months ago screamo music would have scared the shit out of me. Now I'm listening to bands like brokeNCYDE, A Day to Remember, and Eatmewhileimhot!. And one thing I noticed about nine-months-ago me was that I never ever put that I was listening to music while I wrote those stupid little state-of-the-union things. What was wrong with me? Going on the computer and not listening to music? WHAT?
And I said that listening to the electronica music genre was weird ... again, WHAT?
And my writing. Yeah, it's improved. My second semester English teacher really whipped me into shape. And I've been practicing.
My running? Hasn't been that great. I love running, don't get me wrong. I'm just not motivated and/or busy. Indoor track stars in late November, and I'm super excited for that.
Well, I suppose that's all for now. When I'll post again, I have no idea.

And I'm going to be looking at this in another nine months and thinking, "I was so stupid..."

And I'm re-reading this right now... and it sounds stupid.

Maybe I haven't changed that much after all?

Oh well...

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